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Why Speed Dating Will Never Work

Sex & Relationships

Why Speed Dating Will Never Work

Why Speed Dating Will Never Work

Let’s face it, the chances of bumping into the love of our lives while waiting for the bus are very thin. Besides, potential lovers might never meet, mainly because we’re glued to our phones and hardly unglue our eyes from the screen, to see what’s going on around us. Diving into a dating app seems to the most logical thing to do when looking for a partner. Love and all its substitutes are available twenty-four seven at our finger tips.

But a new alternative to our loneliness is gaining popularity – speed dating, we leave technology behind and embark on a fast paced love seeking journey, a kind of shop on the go for the heart. Meet-ups are organised with the aim of finding a partner quickly. Speed dating is one of the many options single people have available. The dating market is booming, and singles have never been so well looked after. This can be fun, those looking for a partner have the option of meeting potential candidates in person and decide according to their vibe if that person is worth a chance.

There are no profile pictures involved, neither tedious life goals descriptions. Dating “a la carte”  has found new wave of  followers. Guests pull a series of questions and conversation flows spontaneously. It doesn’t matter if the person sitting in front of you is a potential psychopath, or the next reincarnation of Buddha, speedy dating is a new way of finding love!

Plus, it offers what many dating apps lack-human interaction. Of course, wine and casual chit chat enriches our catalogue of life experiences. Also, sitting for few minutes with a total stranger requires guts. This is a step outside most people’s comfort zones, which is great this is when magic happens.

The thing is though, finding a potential partner takes time. We want fast love, and demand Mr. Right to materialise like the Thai chicken at the corner shop. But love is not a take away meal. Love takes time to nurture, to hit our conscious mind and make us realise we miss that person. Speed dating and all those dating apps may not take into account that for love to happen is not enough a well organised round of meet-ups.

Of course meeting new people makes our lives more interesting. Yet, love surprises us when we least expect it. This is something we can’t predict or even control. There is no way pushing things to happen will work every single time.  It might work for some people, but life knows better.

No matter how many times our societies tell us we can have whatever we want, we can’t control everything, and love is one of those things. We want a partner fast, we have an idea of the perfect partner in our minds, like that cute hand bag from our favourite designer.  At the heart of this lie a need to force things to happen. Instead of going with the flow, we demand love now. We feel entitled to have it when we want it. We take love as a commodity, as something that can be bought on the spot. This only brings frustrations and disappointment, because life doesn’t work that way, we have to relax and let go of the need to control everything. Love can’t be controlled, it’s unpredictable.  And it’ll show up when we don’t look for it.

For more interesting dating reading see

https://conscioustalkmag.com/2018/04/know-youre-dating-true-gentleman/

Writer/blogger curious about life, arts, and tech. Coffee addict and never too tired for a late night chit-chat. Forget about the Film Studies Degree, life has taught her more stuff. She has so much to say, hold tight.

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